The Philippine's Biggest Joke Depository
Get a Joke Everyday in your e-mail

 

HOME

 

JOKE ARCHIVES

 

  February 2nd  Week

 

 

Feb 12, 2000

Q: Whatís the similarity between a vendo machine and Monica Lewinsky?
A: Both have slots that says: Insert BILL here ó>

Q: Why should we not pass judgement on Monica Lewinsky?
A: Because "napasubo lang siya!"

Q: Pano mo malalaman kung yung manok sa palengke ay lalake o babae?
LALAKE> TITImbangin
BABAE> KIKIluhin


Feb 11, 2000

Q: Anong mangyayari kay Tweety Bird kapag uminom siya ng Viagra?
A: Magiging Big Bird

Q: Anong mangyayari kay Felix the Cat kapag uminom ng Viagra?
A: Eh di magiging Felix BAKAT!

Q: Anong mangyayari kay Kermit the Frog kapag uminom ng Viagra?
A: Eh di magiging PALAKA-NTOT!


Feb 10, 2000

Anong tunog ng falling rock?
BLAG!
Ano naman ang tunog ng falling water?
WOOSH!
Eh ano naman ang tunog ng falling pubic hair?
PWE!

How can you tell when a woman is not wearing any underwear?
ANSWER: By the dandruff on her shoes.

Anong tawag sa maliit na goat?
KAPIRANGGOAT!

Eh sa maliit na cat?
CATITING!

Eh sa maliit na duck?
PANDUCK!

Ano naman ang tawag sa maliit na dick?
BUTITI!

Sent in by Alfred G.


Feb 9, 2000

Q: Ano ang difference ng BADING at CANNIBAL?
A: Ang CANNIBAL kumakain ng KA-URI, ang BADING kumakain ng KA-ARI!

Q: Paano namatay si Capt. Hook?
A: Nangati itl*g niya at kinamot!

 


Feb 8, 2000

At 4 yrs. old. BOY BASTOS:

Nay, pano po ba talaga ako ginawa
NANAY: Ah, eh kasi bigay ka ng langit.
BOY BASTOS: Ang taas ng langit ah! Buti umabot ang tit* sa inyo!

BOY BASTOS seeís a nude girl.

BOY BASTOS: Lord, close my eyes.
Girl nears Boy Bastos.
BOY BASTOS: Lord, close my eyes!
Girl sits on Boy Bastosí lap.
BOY BASTOS: Lord, my eyes!
Girl grabs Boy Bastosí dick.
BOY BASTOS: Lord, close YOUR eyes!


Feb 7, 2000

As Easy AS ABC

ABC - Always Buy Condom.

DEF - Donít Ever Fuck without it.

GHI - Goto Her Immediately!

JKLM - Ja KoL Muna.

NOPQRSTUVW - No Other Person Quite Right Shall Taunt You Very Well.

XYZ - Xee Your Zperm!


Feb 6, 2000

Qualities of a good blowjob:

1) RELIGIOUS (lumuluhod)
2) JUDY ANN LOOK-A-LIKE (malaki panga)
3) SWIMMER (mahaba hininga)
4) BUNGAL (para hinde sabit ngipin)
5) MALAKI TENGA (para handy)
6) MALAPAD ULO (para patungan ng beer)

 

BACK
                                      

 

Copyright © 1999 Philhumor.com All Rights Reserved
PHILHUMOR.COM
Makati City
Philippines